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Falon’Din’s Plaint: A Song Post
Those of you familiar with the glitterotica pantheon theory for the ancient elvhen gods likely have an image of Falon’Din built up in your heads. For some reason, he’s emerged as the bad boy of Arlathan, a combination of Alex from A Clockwork Orange and Harry Potter’s Voldemort—pointlessly, gleefully, viciously evil and over-the-top powerful.
Yet lore tells us of a softer side to Falon’Din, a deep and abiding friendship, a beautiful love for Dirthamin, his almost-brother and closest companion. What does a pair of gorgeous, morally bankrupt immortal men do? Apparently, in the case of Falon’Din, head canon insists he spends his time complaining about how amazing he is.
I know you’ve all heard someone while about how they’re so sexy or rich or smart that it’s all become so terribly dull,
whether on-line or in real life. My real-world examples all came from keggers, which is prime real estate for college kids drunk enough to try that hard to impress one another.
Glitterotica Falon’Din, on the other hand, not only believes his own propaganda but has a fair amount of evidence to back it up. Thus when They Might Be Giants came on the other day and asked me what they were to do with all this Extra Savoir-Faire I immediately thought of our glorious, evil elf god.
As an added bonus, the first line sounds like just the sort of weird insult Falon’Din would use for actual elves and which Dirthamin, knowing precisely how his mind works, would understand instantly. Have a listen and picture, if you will, a pair of beautiful creatures lolling about their crystal tree tower, gleaming and glittering, while the darker of the pair winds his plaintive voice around his lover like his body.
When I walk down the street, most guys look like elves
I don't mean to put them down but they do
It's hard to understand me from the language I use
There's no word in English for my style
What's a man like me supposed to do
With all this extra savoir-faire
What is left for me to prove, dear
I know just what to do when the ladies come 'round
You can try to copy me but you'll fail
Now, you might think you're different but time will prove me right
When you wake up from your dream I'll be gone
What's a man like me supposed to do
With all this extra savoir-faire
What is left for me to prove, dear
Yet lore tells us of a softer side to Falon’Din, a deep and abiding friendship, a beautiful love for Dirthamin, his almost-brother and closest companion. What does a pair of gorgeous, morally bankrupt immortal men do? Apparently, in the case of Falon’Din, head canon insists he spends his time complaining about how amazing he is.
I know you’ve all heard someone while about how they’re so sexy or rich or smart that it’s all become so terribly dull,
whether on-line or in real life. My real-world examples all came from keggers, which is prime real estate for college kids drunk enough to try that hard to impress one another.
Glitterotica Falon’Din, on the other hand, not only believes his own propaganda but has a fair amount of evidence to back it up. Thus when They Might Be Giants came on the other day and asked me what they were to do with all this Extra Savoir-Faire I immediately thought of our glorious, evil elf god.
As an added bonus, the first line sounds like just the sort of weird insult Falon’Din would use for actual elves and which Dirthamin, knowing precisely how his mind works, would understand instantly. Have a listen and picture, if you will, a pair of beautiful creatures lolling about their crystal tree tower, gleaming and glittering, while the darker of the pair winds his plaintive voice around his lover like his body.
When I walk down the street, most guys look like elves
I don't mean to put them down but they do
It's hard to understand me from the language I use
There's no word in English for my style
What's a man like me supposed to do
With all this extra savoir-faire
What is left for me to prove, dear
I know just what to do when the ladies come 'round
You can try to copy me but you'll fail
Now, you might think you're different but time will prove me right
When you wake up from your dream I'll be gone
What's a man like me supposed to do
With all this extra savoir-faire
What is left for me to prove, dear
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